APHORISMS

APHORISM:
A Short, Pointed Sentence That Expresses A Wise
or Clever Observation or A General Truth.

1) The nicest thing about the future is … that it always starts tomorrow.
2) Money will buy a fine dog, but only kindness will make him wag his tail.
3) Seat belts are not as confining as wheelchairs.
4) A good time to keep your mouth shut is when you’re in deep water.
5) Why is it that at class reunions you feel younger than everyone else looks?
6) Scratch a cat . . . and you will have a permanent job.
7) No one has more driving ambition than the teenage boy who wants to
buy a car.
8) There are no new sins; the old ones just get more publicity.
9) How come it takes so little time for a child who is afraid of the dark to
become a teenager who wants to stay out all night?
10) No one ever says “It’s only a game” when their team is winning.
11) There are worse things than getting a call for a wrong number at 4am like, it could be the right number.
12) I’ve reached the age where ‘happy hour’ is a nap.
13) Be careful about reading the fine print … there’s no way you’re going to like it.
14) The trouble with bucket seats is that not everybody has the same size
bucket.
15) Business conventions are important, because they demonstrate how
many people a company can operate without.
16) Always be yourself because the people that matter don’t mind … and the ones that mind don’t matter.
17) After 60 if you don’t wake up aching in every joint you’re probably dead.
18) Life isn’t tied with a bow . . . but it’s still a gift.

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